Cupid Bow Mouth

Every New Year's it seems I wind up back at Livejournal, even though it's once in a blue moon that I post anymore. Funny, considering how much I lived on LJ back in ye olden days.

With all the nostalgia and looking back and reviewing that happens this time of year, I guess it does make sense that I end up back here because whatever small fannish activity that I still indulge in happens to some small degree, here.

That said, I totally miss fandom and the community and the discussions. I wish I could latch onto another fandom with the same vigor and fervour that I did the Joss-verse, but it just doesn't seem to pan out. Although, I am just as rabid in some respects (see my love for The Walking Dead and how I might not be watching the last half of season 5 on account of Beth).

Now, I wrote zero fic in 2013, much to my dismay. But 2014 saw a little bit happening. Largely in fandoms other than the Joss-verse. That moment when the lightening flashed and I was all about Buffy and Angel have gone the way of the Tasmanian tiger. That's okay, I suppose. I did write an original collection of shorts in 2013. It's free now everywhere if anyone wants to download it. All This and Love, available at most e-retailers near you. /shameless plug

Anyway, my year in fic:

to memory now recalled | The Walking Dead thru 4.8: too far gone | Carl | PG | anyone or everyone, those who are dead are not dead, they're just living in my head and since I fell for that spell, I am living there as well.

sugar glass | Hunger Games: Mockingjay (book) | Finnick/Katniss | G | you are terrifying / and strange and beautiful / something not everyone knows how to love.

kiss me, and you will see how important I am | The Walking Dead thru 4.12: Still | Daryl/Beth | PG | Sorry about the blood in your mouth. I wish it was mine.

Cake | Angel AU thru 3.11: Birthday | Cordelia, Buffy/Angel | PG, mostly for themes | "To lose your heart is not a path for the faint and fainting." Here is where the story changes: Cordelia.

Happy Xmas (War is Over) | BtVS post-Chosen AU | Dawn/Spike | NC-17 | "Against the tide we struggle with the skin we're in." Dawn, after.

unfinished kita holiday fic | AtS | Angel/Connor | G | "Unfinished fic, annexed.

The Dandelion Seed (Unfinished and Annexed Fic) | BtVS/Wicked/The Wizard of Oz | Gen | PG-13 for themes | "Was she to be taken seriously, or was she merely a blow-away dandelion seed, caught on the wrong side of the wind?"


***

My favorite story this year (my own): There's a tie between sugar glass and kiss me, and you will see how important I am.

My best story this year: That's hard because I don't take as much care as I used to and I don't get things beta'd, so it's all haphazard. Probably sugar glass.

My favorite line of this year: Totally don't have one. Maybe ... "When Dawn comes, she smells of Buffy." for all the ways that it's totally fucked up.

Most fun story: Don't write those. Never did. So, BAU.

Sexiest story: sugar glass because there's a broken comfort and sensuality, I think, between Finnick and Katniss.

Story with single sexiest moment: sugar glass. I really like how Katniss can feel the pull of Finnick's smile against her cheek and the whole body chair thing (not as creepy-weird as that sentence probably sounds).

"Holy crap, that's wrong, even for you" story: Ha! Happy Xmas (War is Over). I cut most of the explicitly incest-y bits, but it's definitely not rainbows and sunshine over there.

Fic that shifted my perceptions of the characters: to memory now recalled and kiss me, and you will see how important I am.

Biggest disappointment: Happy Xmas (War is Over). It's just raw and I will never be able to fix it. Not to mention I'm not really interested in trying to.

Hardest story to write: Happy Xmas (War is Over) which was mostly written years ago, but which I finally tacked an ending to and released into the wild.

Easiest story to write: kiss me, and see how important I am

Most unintentionally telling story: I never know what that MEANS!

What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted in January 2014: The Walking Dead

Did you take any writing risks this year? What did you learn from them?: Not especially. Trying to finish a longer a narrative piece, maybe? Happy Xmas (War is Over) was difficult partially because of it's length. I always have a hard time with longer pieces and I still don't know how to change or fix that.

Okay, so, Happy New Year, my darlings. I hope 2015 is better than you hope for. And as Brad Paisley apparently once said, 'Tomorrow, is the first blank page of a 365 page book. Write a good one.'

Last year was ... it was ... and now it's finished. I didn't really do all that much writing. Picked at things and started things, but me with the finishing of things just didn't seem to happen. I don't feel like I have a muse anymore. I suppose that Agatha really took that death scene back in Crave pretty hard. But, here is what I did accomplish on the fic front, sad though it may be.


like never, and like always (BtVS/Angel)
The Law of Equivalent Exchange (BtVS)
as soon as forever is through (Boys Over Flowers)
Beloved (Star Trek: AOS)


My favorite story this year (my own): as soon as forever is through was hard to write because it was hard to hear. The dissonance between reading subtitles and listening to the cadences of the Korean language complicated my writing process. However, overall, it is the thing that I am most proud of this year. I love the language, and despite the complications, the rhythm, and the points that I tried to make about the characters and how they break.

My best story this year: as soon as forever is through

My favorite line of this year: TIE!!!!!
"Buffy thinks of Oz and how sometimes you have to leave to save your own life." - like never and like always

"Everything is the beginning of something until it's the end and there is Dawn on the floor of the bathroom dipping fingers into a puddle the impossibly dark red of black currant." - The Law of Equivalent Exchange

Story most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion: I didn't write enough to judge well. But, maybe, as soon as forever is through.

Most fun story: Yeah, not so much with the fun stories.

Sexiest story: and a no, again.

Story with single sexiest moment: Nope

"Holy crap, that's wrong, even for you" story: No. Everything is pretty much in character, but I suppose the fact that I killed everyone off in The Law of Equivalent Exchange could count for something.

Fic that shifted my perceptions of the characters: n/a

Biggest disappointment: The Law of Equivalent Exchange. I really intended this to be a more traditional narrative, but it just kinda didn't work out that way.

Hardest story to write: like never and like always was from a gifted prompt and I struggled with it. I felt like I should have been able to just write it and get it, but the execution was a major challenge. Moving the story from my head to paper, while keeping in mind the prompt was just more difficult then I think it should have been.

Easiest story to write: The Law of Equivalent Exchange wasn't what I really wanted it to be, but the images made it to paper with astonishing ease. Maybe because I did break it up and didn't try to force a frame on it that was inorganic to the story. I dunno know.

Most unintentionally telling story: n/a

What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted in January 2010: as soon as forever is through is based on a kdrama. I NEVER thought that would happen.

Did you take any writing risks this year? What did you learn from them?: n/a

WHAT I WROTE THIS YEAR:
(9 drabbles, 4 fic)
Kvika (Angel, Angel/Nina, R)
Col Arco (with bow) (BtVS, Buffy/Angel, PG-13)
Into the Valley (Angel, Holtz, G)
The Tyger and the Lamb (Angel, Angel, G)
Slayer's Lament (BtVS, Buffy, PG)
Sogni della Bambola (Gunslinger Girl, ensemble, G)
Pas de Trois (Basilisk, Sameon, G)
Reboot (Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles, Cameron, G)
Run (Terminator: Sarah Connor Chronicles, John, Sarah, G)
this is the world, which is round (BtVS, Dawn, PG)
The Seduction of Wendy Darling: A Tragedy in Three Parts (Peter Pan, Wendy, R)
when all the years fill in (Harry Potter, Harry/Ginny, G)
Crave (Twilight, Edward, PG-13)




My favorite story this year (my own): Despite all of its flaws, I think I liked when all the years fill in the most. It was an easy and gentle ficlet to write and does exactly what I intended. Surprising considering that its my first HP fic.

My best story this year: This year was another year of drabbles. Fic was very thin on the ground. I don't think that I can be objective enough this year to determine this one. Execution wise, despite risks I took with structure, this is the world, which is round.

My favorite line of this year: This is ALWAYS such a hard question to answer. But - you were seventeen and the only promise anyone had ever made to you was to die on your behalf. -- when all the years fill in

Story most underappreciated by the universe, in my opinion: I am really split between Crave and this is the world, which is round.

Most fun story: I have an annoying habit of not writing fun stories. Although, despite its tone I'll go with Sogni della Bambola. I really enjoyed writing the opening lines.

Sexiest story: Col Arco (with bow)

Story with single sexiest moment: Col Arco (with bow)

"Holy crap, that's wrong, even for you" story: That *would* have been this is the world, which is round, only the story up and changed on me.

Fic that shifted my perceptions of the characters: when all the years fill in because I really got to explore a kind of reality for Harry and who he is outside of and beyond being a Hero.

Biggest disappointment: Although I find parts of it successful, I'm still not totally happy with The Seduction of Wendy Darling.

Hardest story to write: this is the world, which is round. It was originally intended to be this epic Christmas fic about Dawn's rebellion against Buffy when Angel suddenly reappears post-NFA. It was going to be ensemble and angsty and there was going to be shouting and slamming doors and lots of dysfuntional Dawn/Spike sex. Faith was going to show up post-Gathered in the Gales and exchange one liners with Xander. I had this whole picture!! Only, well, it turned out to be alot harder to write and evolved into the story that I submitted for the 2008 lynnevitational.

Easiest story to write: when all the years fill in was a dream to write.

Most unintentionally telling story: Crave, although it's possible that most people would pick when the years fill in.

What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted in January 2008: Oh, good grief!! Twilight. Who would have thunk it!!

Did you take any writing risks this year? What did you learn from them?: This year was a real non-starter for me in the fic department. I can't say that I really pushed my limits. this is the world, which is round was me attempting to try something different (writing a longer fic) but it didn't pan out. I'd still like to give it a go one day, but I really have to figure out how to begin and sustain momentum.

Stories I wrote this year:
Vex Not the Roses (BtVS; Giles/Olivia)
Ever After: Five Fairy Tale Endings (BtVS, Buffy/Angel)
Burn the Flag (Firefly; River)
Scratched (Farscape; John/Aeryn) drabble
Ghost Ship (Firefly; River) drabble
to say nothing of the lavender (Firefly; Zoe/Wash) drabble
of blessed memory (The 4400; Sean) drabble
Baby (Angel; Angel, Connor) drabble
Five Reasons Charles Gunn Doesn't Wear a Do-Rag (Angel; Gunn)
Acta Sanctorum (Firefly; Reaver) drabble
Burn (Firefly; Wash) drabble
Light (Angel; Wesley) drabble
Leviticus (Buffy; Other) drabble
Dream in Pink (pre-BtVS; Joyce) drabble
ETARace, Roses and Orchids (commentary on Vex Not the Roses)

My favorite story this year (of my own):
Burn the Flag

My best story this year:
politically and meta-textually probably Vex Not the Roses

Story most under appreciated by the universe, in my opinion:
Burn the Flag

Most fun story:
Sorry to say there were no fun stories this year.

Sexiest story:
Hmmm .... not so much with the sex either, but if I had to say what story had the most sex in it ... probably Ever After.

Story with single sexiest moment:
Ever After is definitly NOT sexy. But it has serious sex in it.

Hardest story to write:
Ever After

Most unintentionally *telling* story:
I still have no idea what this means.


I can't believe that I only wrote three full-fledge fics this year. WTF?! How can that possibly be true?! I am aghast. Completely aghast.

Stories I wrote this year: A Pivot for the Sun, To the Waters and the Wild, Eternal Return and When In Dreams I See Her, revised A Pivot for the Sun, A Wave of Moonlight Gloss, Have You Seen the Wind?, The Fall of Night, but then shall you know, No Tomatoes, and if you should have a future

My favorite story this year (of my own): When in Dreams I See Her

My best story this year: When in Dreams I See Her

Story most under appreciated by the universe, in my opinion: When in Dreams I See Her, but then shall you know, and if you should have a future

Most fun story: Well, seeing as how I never write fun stories.

Sexiest story: yea. again, not so much.


Story with single sexiest moment: see above

Hardest story to write: A Pivot for the Sun because it was just damned awkward and Eternal Return because it just refused to be written.

Most unintentionally *telling* story: I have no clue what this question means.


that's it. fic 2004. Nothing made much of a splash. Guess that speaks for it all.