What can you see? Maybe it's an oubliette from the inside

[seraphcelene]

I seem to be losing the skirmish, the battle, the war. The light behind my eyes isn't as bright as it once was and shadows encroach faster than I would ever have imagined. How do you move beyond ennui? Cynicism? Hopelessness? How do you find the reason, the song, the soft, chewy center that makes it all worth while?

Sometimes, I really wish it were The Day After Tomorrow. Then maybe we could all start over. But how do you manage that when you've still got something to lose? When there are others counting on you not to wipe the slate clean and start from the bottom? When your own expectations make it difficult to follow that particular path?

Heartedly disinterested. I'm still waiting for the sign-ups for the Let's Habitat Mars League. I might be the first one on-board. There are many days when I wish that I didn't watch the news or read the newspaper. Some times I really wish I were an orphan. But take it all back because I love my family more than words can say, otherwise I wouldn't bother.

I don't remember signing up for this.